I received an email last week from my former boss offering me a part time position at the office where I first began my ophthalmology career. The place is close to my house, I would be doing something I am already proficient in, I know the docs, I know the employees, and I absolutely adore the elderly patients. When I first read the email I was tempted to reply back immediately; ready, willing and able to start as soon as the whistle blew, but before hitting the send button I took a step back to question this impulsive decision. I tried to reason that it was only two days per week, and that in those two days I would be making enough to pay the rent, which during my first round of reasoning was the only part that mattered.
A conversation with Butterfinger helped me to look at the bigger picture. Yes, the position would only be two days per week, but, fortunately or unfortunately (still have not figured out which one) my mind has a hard time of breaking free from recurring commitments. While my time commitment in the actual office would be meager, the thought of having to go into work for those two days would inevitably have an effect on what I did for the rest of the week. I can only imagine that this would adversely influence my present state of productivity, leading to a poor writing quality and less output volume.
I still remember what it was like to return home after an 8 hour day and a 2 hour commute, being too exhausted to articulate my thoughts. While I love old people with eye problems, they can be quite a handful. After you return from work you need a certain amount of time to transition your brain into focusing on something else, which is fine if your goal for the evening is to see who won American Idol, but is not so excellent when you need to sit down and create a website. I guess the point I am trying to make is, I really am not willing to return to a monotonous, brain rotting position in return for some rent money and companionship.
I had a hard time this morning writing my reply email. It is a troublesome task to find the right words to describe that while, you really appreciate someone’s offer, despite their best intentions to make the job sound appealing, you are not comfortable with returning to your former office-drone self, and have elected to continue on your present trajectory of happiness in poverty. Despite what the words above may indicate, I have no harsh feelings toward the place I used to work, and it took me about a week to finally come to the conclusion that I was not going back. I just have come too far to turn back now, and I just somehow know that going back is going to take me back into a rut that I worked so hard to get out of these past few months. So thanks, but no thanks.
Share ThisMay 19th, 2008 | Employment, Startup Relationships, The Startup
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