Oregon Trail Anyone?

The terminal I use at work to schedule patient appointments, enter charges, and write numerous entertaining messages to co-workers that shall remain nameless, runs on a DOS operating system circa 1988. Its gray screen with orange lettering, and complementary WYSE keyboard, get the job done using a sequence of nonsensical three-letter codes that get you into different aspects of the program. When someone wants to schedule an appointment, my brain tells me it is an A,B,S, and if I need to tell a patient why they owe $13.57 co-insurance (a word to insurance companies – why can’t we just round this stuff off? the elderly have a really hard time writing checks that include any sort of uneven dollar amount), that is a D,B,I of course!

I have often wondered why I am stranded in the forefront of the office battlefield internet-less. To me it is the equivalent of throwing a person adorned in a meat suit into a cage with 5 tigers that have not eaten for weeks. Do they think I will abuse my internet privileges and use Meebo (you can use it on the bottom middle of this page to chat with me if I am around) to chat with those of you wonderful enough to read this blog? If that is the worry, it may be warranted, but could I at least have internet for those times when there is no one in the office, and I am left alone to organize handouts and coupons in an OCD-like manner while counting down the minutes until 5pm? I mean, it is not like we are living in communist China and allowing me to have access to the internet will allow me to look up information I may not otherwise have access to, and that the “forbidden info” could somehow change my opinion on the place of work where I spend the greater portion of my weeks.

I just think my days would be a lot more pleasant if I had the ability to read my email at lunchtime, or check in with Butterfinger while I sit on hold. I really think the patients would appreciate it too, seeing as I would be able to send and receive emails, instead of relying on snail mail for photos and records requests. And honestly, my job is really not that mentally demanding, and I think I could really benefit from the cerebral stimulation a quick game of tetris or short sudoku puzzle at infrequent intervals throughout the day, as long as there were no patients to attend to, of course. I am also aware that as I am typing these words it is all in vain because tomorrow I will sit and stare at my antiquated screen, and no matter how hard I wish it into being, Digg is not going to show up when I type in D, I, G. Oregon Trail anyone?