Estate Sale

So I was thinking that when we return from our cross country trek that we should have a garage sale, but instead of having your regular run of the mill sale where people rummage through your junk in the garage, I was thinking about opening up the whole house. In the spirit of being different, I am going to be hosting an “estate sale” when we return to our luxurious Southern California residence. Everything in the estate must go including bathroom fixtures, floors, hunks of wood stacked up in the backyard, wires hanging out of the ceiling, spider webs, pieces of tile, garage door openers, I think you get the idea – nothing is off limits.

This may sound a little crazy, but after seeing the kind of wares people are peddling every week at the local swap meet, I am certain that people will buy all anything. What do people do with all these trinkets and scraps?! I can understand if you are a collector of McDonald’s kids meal prizes, but for everyone else – why do you have 400 unopened sets of mini Ty beanie babies? Are you hoping that one day the US Beanie Baby market is going to return to its point of prosperity in the late 90s? If so, I have a little news flash for you, no one wants beanie babies, pogs, windbreaker sets, or used shoes with light-up soles, and they surely do not want them for $10 a shoe. The previous statement is of course not true if we are talking about garbage pail kids or pez dispensers:)

So I welcome all collectors of junk, old tools, 1970s style bathroom fixtures, and rusty pool supplies to join me in late-January or early-February for the event of a lifetime. I might even let you have the windows if you are really lucky, I guess it depends on if we know who will be taking over the house by that point. The more dramatic the house process, the bigger the sale!! All potential buyers are urged to call and thank the great people of the many american mortgage companies for making this event possible. Food and refreshments will not be provided, but you are more than welcome to bring us whatever food you like. Restrooms are not available, but feel free to relieve yourself in the backyard, we are trying to collect as much waste back there as possible as a parting gift to our friends at a bank that will remain unnamed. See you then!