This morning I went through the normal routine, and as I made my way hastily to the door I stopped to say goodbye to the dogs. I knelt down to give Tucky a good pat on the head, and as he looked up at me through tired eyes, I saw that the ants had extended their reign of terror into the dogs’ sleeping quarters. My poor Tucky puppy had ants crawling all over his face, in his pink and brown spotted nose, all over his torso, and some even dared to roam into his slightly ajar mouth. As soon as I was aware of their presence they were crawling up my arms, on their way to somehow entering my cranium, and subsequently dining on my brains.

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July 31st, 2007 | Adventures with Dogs, The House | No comments

I have a sometimes roommate named Nutrageous. Nutrageous has been a mutual friend of Butterfinger and I since high school, probably even before high school for Butterfinger. He is an amazingly talented artist and a genuinely kind individual, but he is lacking in the area of domestic intelligence. I am not sure whether he was simply created with this handicap and is missing the household sector of his brain, if he was taught this behavior, or could just care less. Whatever the reason may be, I hope he becomes betrothed to a compulsively tidy and understanding woman.

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July 30th, 2007 | Roommates, The House | No comments